...Well, that was fast.

Didn't the last one just come out in November? 

I'm not going to comment. Instead, I'll leave it to this girl: 

The only reason I'm remotely excited is because I'll get to refine and rewrite my Twilight Drinking Game. But I thought I'd let you watch this girl freak out anyway, since it's immensely amusing.


The Movie Mistress


I Got Tagged!

Taking a break from my normal discussions of lists and reviews, My Floating Red Couch has brought me into this mystical game of Movie Bloggers sharing their insights about themselves, and I feel the need to oblige. The harder part for me will be figuring out who I should "tag," but we'll worry about that later. We'll keep it short and sweet so that you can all get out on time. 

Top Ten Movie Facts About Myself:

1. The first movie I ever saw in the theatre sans my parents was Babe 2: Pig in the City. I was eight and thought it was the coolest thing ever that my friend and I got to go in without an adult. 

2. I didn't see Gone With the Wind until this year (sad, I know, but totally worth the wait). 

3. I'm not one for buying food at the movie theatre unless it's like five people sharing one thing of popcorn. As a result, my friends and I have smuggled everything from gourmet salads to root beer floats into the theatre without ever getting caught. 

4. I'm still bitter about Judi Dench winning Best Supporting Actress for Shakespeare in Love (even though it was over ten years ago), and will be for a long time. 

5. I cried for over an hour when Christopher Reeve died.

6. My favorite child actor is Justin Henry in Kramer vs. Kramer. A close second would be Anna Paquin in The Piano

7. I'll admit to taking part in a Disney movie marathon... over the age of eighteen. 

8. Movies I have memorized all the way through (and can literally recite from opening statement to end): Robin Hood: Men in Tights, Ever After (although I haven't tried to recite this one in a while so I don't know well it would turn out).

9. The first horror movie I saw was the Shining. I honestly don't know how I made it through when I was eight without getting serious nightmares, since it wasn't until high school that I stopped finding horror movies scary. Although, I did see Darkness Falls in middle school and didn't find the tooth fairy scary in the slightest. 

10. The most recent movie I've watched all the way through is The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. And yes, you should expect a post soon. 

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Okay!

People I plan to tag:
Blog Cabins


The Mad Hatter 

Let's hope they don't all hate me.


The Movie Mistress


The Runaways (2010)


I saw this movie last week, and while I enjoyed it, I had mixed feelings. Not because the film was bad; on the contrary, it was a lot better than I expected, given my general disdain for Kristen Stewart films. I had no problem with any of the performances in the film, and thought that Michael Shannon was especially creepy/fantastic as music producer Kim Fowley. What bothered me was the ignoring of age limits for the two stars, who are both incredibly high profile. 

I though that Dakota Fanning's performance was incredible as drug addict/ rocker/ social outcast Cherie Currie, but the fact that there was a ridiculously tripped out sex scene between her and Kristen Stewart really bothered me. Stewart is 20. Fanning is 15. Does anyone else see a problem with this? Granted, nothing was actually shown, but to me, that doesn't matter. What matters is that most people know the ages of both these stars, and it isn't appropriate. I don't care if they're the greatest actors in the world- you can't ignore casting someone in an age appropriate role just because they're famous. This isn't a Woody Allen movie. It would be one thing if both actors were fifteen, or both were of age. I think that the casting directors took for granted the fact that most child actors are viewed as ageless- if you're seven, you can play anywhere from five to ten, and no one pays attention. You're just "a child." However, just because Dakota Fanning isn't a child actor anymore doesn't mean she's an adult, and if you've seen the movie, that was a pretty "adult" scene. 

In the film, Joan Jett is clearly older to begin with, which is another thing that bothered me because it could constitute the drugged-out seduction as rape. I'm not saying this was intended on the part of the filmmakers. The fact that Kristen Stewart is older doesn't help, and had they cast an unknown in either part it would have lessened the reaction value. Or maybe that's what they wanted. 

Cherie Currie does have sex several times before her scene with Joan Jett (and I'm sure that the guys shown are older than eighteen), but the fact that both the stars are so well known as child actors with different ages was what set it over the edge. Had Dakota Fanning and Kristen Stewart been replaced by less well known actors, the sex scene wouldn't have been quite as unsettling. 


Other than that one scene, I found the movie really enjoyable. It had a kick-ass soundtrack and was darkly amusing, putting funny one-liners in what would ordinarily be sad situations. Example: Cherie's father has just collapsed from drinking too much and Joan Jett jacks his booze. The film forces you to think about the humor in dire ocurrences, an ironic snapshot of what goes into building rock and roll. Michael Shannon was awesome, playing Kim Fowley as both creepy yet necessary- the girls put up with his bullshit because without him, there's no band. And he knows it- serious discussions are made randomly funny because he is in total control (example: there's a phone conversation about food and supplies where he's hanging upside down with no explanation). 

If the filmmakers were trying to make a statement, they did. What it was, I would really like to know, so if anyone has any ideas, shoot them out. Until then, I'm going to just pretend that I don't know who Kristen Stewart or Dakota Fanning are, since that's how I can enjoy the movie. It's just a shame that their performances were clouded by what are considered to be incredibly important social norms. 


The Movie Mistress


Trailer- Dinner for Schmucks

Being a fan of Jeff Dunham, I had heard that he was in a new movie and decided to scope it out. This is what I found:

My feelings are mixed. Do I sit through what looks to be a ridiculously bad movie in order to see one of my favorite comedians get screen time? Or do I skip it and wait for the 30 seconds he appears in to be broadcasted on Youtube? 

Watching this trailer made me realize that outside of The Office, I'm really not a fan of Steve Carell. He seems to play the same pratfall-inducing character in every single movie, save for Dan in Real Life, which was boring. I also find it fascinating that Paul Rudd has suddenly become this huge star overnight, since before Knocked Up he was just "that guy from Clueless." 

I guess I'm just sort of ambivalent to this movie because it's been a while since I've seen a mainstream comedy that was actually intelligent. I mean, The Hangover won Best Comedy at the Golden Globes. While it was funny, it was just all mindless. And just by watching the trailer for this movie I know that the whole point is to make fun of stupid people. I can already tell that by the end of the movie, the message will be that "idiots are people too." The supposed friendship of Steve Carell and Paul Rudd just screams it.

Well, yes, so then why make a movie where the point is for people to laugh about it? Why not make a social commentary film instead? 

The last legitimately funny movie I saw that was made by a major movie studio (and by major studio I mean Paramount, Columbia, Focus, Disney...)  was Enchanted, and even that was targeted toward a specific niche. And I can tell you that if Susan Sarandon hadn't been in it, my admiration for it would have been much lower. 

What I'm trying to say is, "Don't do it, Jeff Dunham!" Keep doing standup. Because right now, there's nothing out there for you in terms of comedy. You'll end up like Dane Cook. Seriously- did anyone even see Employee of the Month? Do this movie and then STOP. 

That's all I have to say. 


The Movie Mistress


The Top Ten Female Action Stars

Because blogging is largely about reading others' work and saying "I could do that, but better...." I've decided to do a response post to a recent post by one of my fellow Movie Bloggers, Heather of Movie Mobsters. I read the Top Ten Action Stars (which I'll give props to being well written and well thought out and entertaining) and was slightly uncomfortable that there were no women on the list. I get that the typical action "hero" in the past has been a male-dominated genre, but there are plenty of women that kick ass on screen and ones that I would argue rose to fame as being action stars. So the following is a list of my favorites, in a moment of Female Empowerment:

10. Milla Jojovich

I haven't seen Resident Evil, nor do I intend to. However, I did see the Fifth Element, and I think that to call Bruce Willis the star of this movie is an overstatement, because Milla Jojovich as an action star provided cause for the entire plot to happen. There wouldn't have been a movie without her, and if you don't have any idea what I'm talking about, go out and rent it because all I can say is that action movies are where she belongs.

9. Sienna Miller

She was the only remotely interesting character in G.I. Joe. Most likely because they gave her actual action skills to work with instead of computer animated technology. Let's ponder this and make the connection between her being the lead female character.

8. Franka Potente

I first saw her in the Bourne Identity and thought she was pretty awesome. Then, I saw Run, Lola, Run. All I can say is, if there were more female characters that were along the lines of Lola, the movie industry would be a much better place for women.

7. Lucy Liu

From being the only one to actually look like she has some sort of fighting skills in Charlie's Angels (Drew Barrymore? Really? We're not that stupid) to being a murderess in Chicago, to playing the head of the Japanese Mafia in Kill Bill, I think we can successfully come to the conclusion that Lucy Liu is ruthless.

6. Jennifer Garner

She successfully took her TV action skills and seamlessly transitioned from "Alias" to Daredevil, and then to Elektra. We forget that before desperate Mom-to-be in Juno, there was Jennifer Garner the action hero synonymous with being a double agent, and later a superhero.

5. Rosario Dawson

Sin City. Josie and the Pussycats. Deathproof. Men In Black 2. Is there anything Rosario can't do? There are no words. I tried to find a clip from Sin City to show how awesome she is, but alas, there were none on youtube save for stupid fan shit. We'll just have to tap into the most memorable parts of the movie stored in our brains. 

4. Sigourney Weaver

I have yet to see a movie Sigourney Weaver in which there aren't aliens involved, unless you count GhostBusters. And WALL-E. But... yeah. She's kind of always fighting something, which is what makes her an awesome action star, from Alien to Galaxy Quest to Avatar. You can't have a list like this and not include Sigourney Weaver.

3. Linda Hamilton

There is no better female action hero than Sarah Conner. Although Linda Hamilton has had a pretty successfully diverse acting career since 1984, the world will forever remember her as the awesomely ripped gun-loading futuristic female hero and later mom (I, personally liked Judgement Day waaay better).

2. Kate Beckinsale

Although a lot of people associate her with being in serious indie movies, people seem to forget that Kate Beckinsale first came to our attention kicking ass and taking werewolf names in Underworld, and then again in the sequel (both of which I have seen, although I must admit that I never saw Rise of the Lycans and opted instead to see My Bloody Valentine in 3D. I still am not sure if I made the right decision). Needless to say, I would call her a pretty awesome female action star.

1. Anjelina Jolie

Though she has dabbled more recently in serious dramatic roles (and even won an Oscar for Girl, Interrupted), I would argue that Anjelina Jolie, whether you're a fan of hers or not, is the Queen of Action Movies. From the time she took on Lara Croft, America has embraced her as this emblem of what the most awesomely badass female can aspire to. Add that to Gone in 60 Seconds, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, Wanted, and now Salt, she dominates the action world. Even at forty, she still can hang out of a car window and shoot bad guys. If that's not an action star, I don't know what is.


The Movie Mistress